Mr Right? Check this out...

An article I came across in The Straits Times Life section yesterday... just want to share it with you. Enjoy!

As heartless as a checklist may seem, it really can't hurt to be methodical about love...

By Sandra Leong
sandral@sph.com.sg

IN A bid to snap me out of a post-break-up stupor, my friends have been trying to set me up on blind dates, movie dates, concert dates, speed dates, cycling dates - you name it, I've heard it. Horrified at the thought of going on a bigger sale than Robinsons, I've sullenly refused to play along.

Work is always a handy excuse. There's always a last-minute assignment that has cropped up or a tyrannical boss who is keeping me chained to my desk. (In reality, I'm stretched out at home playing Guitar Hero II on my Nintendo Wii.)

Recently, a group of exasperated buddies sat me down and demanded I tell them what my 'type' was.

'Tell us what sort of guy you like and we will find him for you,' said one, his pen poised diligently over his reporter's notepad.

'Yeah,' said another adamantly. 'Surely you must have some sort of checklist.'

I hemmed and hawed feebly for a few minutes, then came up with a few qualities: Must be taller than me - which isn't asking for much since I'm barely 1.6m tall. Must speak and write English properly. Must like Radiohead.

'That's it?' they cried. 'You have no standards.'

I honestly thought 'must like Radiohead' narrowed the field - till my friend reminded me that the British alternative rock band has sold in excess of 20 million albums worldwide.

Thing is, I've never believed in 'types' or dating checklists of any kind.

When it comes to getting to know people, I would much rather go with the flow, seeking a connection rather than a series of must-haves that can be mentally - or sometimes physically - checked off a list.

The last two men I dated seriously couldn't be more different. One was stout, outgoing and had a high-flying career, the other was tall, quiet and had dreams of being an underpaid researcher.

Eventually, both relationships ended not because of differences in character or incompatibility, but because neither he nor I were on the same page when it came to our future.

So as a not-so-swinging single bemoaning a recently failed relationship, I'm beginning to wonder if I should adopt a more practical approach to seeking a partner.

A friend who swears by her carefully thought-out checklist reasons that it's already 'half the battle won' when you know what your requirements are.

For her, these include being financially stable, owning a car and a house, and coming from a decent family background. She spent years compartmentalising men into two categories: those who were fun for the moment but realistically speaking, would never make the cut; and those who fulfilled her criteria, but who were less inclined to give her butterflies in her stomach.

The strategy worked. Earlier this year, she finally met a guy who was a bit of both - okay, more of the latter - and hasn't been happier.

She says: 'Most people would be lying if they said they did not have preconceived notions of what they wanted in their mate. So why not take it one step further and draw up a list to focus your energies on finding The One?'

It makes some sense, really. My last relationship fell to pieces because my then-boyfriend was based in the UK and I was here. The distance eventually wore us down.

Perhaps if I had written up a checklist, one of my priorities would have been for my man to be in the same country - or at least, the same continent.

He would have instantly failed the entrance test. I would not have wasted two years of my life with him only to have my heart broken.

After all, matchmaking agencies stake their business on this. They make customers seeking mates state their terms from the get-go: How tall, how old, how rich, what level of commitment.

As methodical an approach to love as it may sound, it can't hurt to play your own Cupid, can it?

Like everything in life, it's a gamble. What if your expectations are never met? What if you meet Mr Right but you end up letting him go because he didn't make the mark?

In an article on dating website Match.com, writer Therese J. Borchard says checklists may help people understand who they are or what they want. 'But they can never capture a real person - or account for the incredible combustion that happens when two people get together and allow themselves to fall in love.'

For now, however, cynical ol' me may just give this checklist business a go. 'Must like Radiohead' sounds like a good place to start.